Saturday, July 4, 2009

A Declaration of Independence


We are at the pool yesterday and we run into some neighbors, they begin to tell me how they had a BBQ recently ( we did not attend but were invited) and our other neighbor busted out my blog. UH OH.... here is the problem. The hubbo and I are on a don't ask , don't tell policy about said blog. I once read him a portion of the blog and I ended it "eat a dick" and his brain almost fell out.

He said" Mama, you can't say eat a dick on your blog, there are people who hang out with our kids reading it".

My response was " you need to respect my creative outlet which is blogging..I would respect you if you wanted to dress up as a viking and gnaw on a turkey leg while you played your Age of Empires game."
So ,we came to what you call an impasse..and the blog had not been read ever since.
WELL... the neighbors sparked a fire under his ass, and he decides to read the blog. I am sweating bullets sitting next to him as he riffles through my past posts. Its not like he doesn't know who he married, he loves my sassy, raunchy side..so what am I sweatin' for?

"Vagina, vagina, vagina that is all you talk about"

Well, yeah I know about mine pretty well, and I'm sure most of my blogging demographic has one and has abused it vigorously while thinking of Robert Pattinson. So, yeah why not talk about the obvious.

The outcome has been great, I am sitting next to him as I write and he says .. " write cock a bunch of times" So, I guess we are no longer at the impasse and I have a new fan. Happy 4th of July everyone...there has been a Declaration of Independence in this house tonight!




13 comments:

Latchkey Wife said...

Nice! ...my blogging demographic has one and has abused it vigorously while thinking of Robert Pattinson! OMG - I'm dying over here.

My husband would fucking die if he saw some of the shit I write - so I'm continuing to keep it a big, giant secret!

fragilelittlehuman said...

I so don't want my DH to read my blog. I'd have to clean up my language and write about rainbows and ponies and some stupid shit like that. I'd much rather write about what I want.

sjAimee said...

My hubs is not allowed at,near,around, etc when it comes to my blog. He doesnt know about my blog.. Nor shall he.. he knows about my family blog.. the one where i love the kids and post happy pics of them playing or giving me the evil eye.. but the rest.. ha!

Undercover Twilighter said...

LOL!! Yeah, NO ONE knows about my blog. I think I might die if they found out. I'm slightly paranoid about getting busted. Hence the name, Undercover Twilighter.

You are one brave woman! Kudos to you.

Fire Crotch said...

Hmmm...yeah, everyone knows about my blog. I shamelessly plug it on my facebook page. I'm sure all those peeps I went to business school with are just rolling their eyes and thinking, "there has to be at least one lunatic in every class." Yup, that's me!

Tasha... said...

Holy SHIT! You are brilliant.

"..dress up as a viking and gnaw on a turkey leg while you played your Age of Empires game."<--is he one of those "people" at the Texas Renaissance Festival?! Please say yes.

You completely talked my ass into unleashing the NC-17! I have a plan to scare off some RL secret readers...my fanfic list. Then I'll just have 'em giving me crazy glances at the store or over dinner. Good times ahead. =D

P.S.
I'm SO adding your funny ass to my addiction list!

caring erratic hairbrained mom said...

@ Tasha- No, he doesn't dress up at the Renaissance Fair, but that would be awesome. Thanks for adding me to your addictions, right back at cha.
Fanfic is a great deterrant of the faint at hear.Some of the recommondations K in the Flo posted on Latchkey's blog almost made my face melt off.

Limey_1996 said...

Oh hello! Didn't know you had a blog.. Woo hoo!

Have you seen the RPattz wet pictures? Holy cock! My knickers just exploded!

:)

karen said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
K_InTheFlo said...

Sorry - A little late getting to this par-tayyyy. What I'm most interested about is why your hubs wants you to write "c#ck" (I'm at work right now)..a bunch of times. Does he like this? Not that there's anything wrong with that. LOL. And I love how you are standing up for your creative cursing. I bow/bend over for ya! LOL.
Oh & I loved your reference to FanFic recs that will melt your face off. I hope to guest blog at LatchkeyWife this friday with some more. MJ's passing and Farrah's just blindsided me..wasn't too smutty in my head.

caring erratic hairbrained mom said...

@ K- on the 4th we were drinking vodka he gets sassy on the vodka. I started to blog & he wanted me to write cock a bunch of times to off set all my vagina talk. I think he secretly likes it he is constantly giving me ammo..

caring erratic hairbrained mom said...

@ K- on the 4th we were drinking vodka he gets sassy on the vodka. I started to blog & he wanted me to write cock a bunch of times to off set all my vagina talk. I think he secretly likes it he is constantly giving me ammo..

Rob's Swiss Miss said...

New to your site, catching up on older posts, and I love your classy style ;)

Hubby is still in the dark about our little blog...I hope he takes it as well as yours did! I have a feeling he'd roll his eyes, call my crazy for the umpteenth time, and then ask for sexual favors in return for secrecy. Ha!